One of the things I do to relax is to play Solitaire on my iPad. It’s a game that teaches me something I need to learn in this incarnation: when to walk away. I used to feel if I just kept at it, tried from every possible angle, I could get there. Then I hit the hint button, and the message comes up “ No useful moves detected”. I need to have this tattooed on my body, somewhere where I can see it. In my work, I get to engage with people of all levels of consciousness. One of the hardest things for me to accept is the soul’s right to not learn. From a Taoist point of view, all illness or imbalance is an invitation to change. To evolve, to grow, to break free of old soul patterns.
About a month ago, I had a client at noon, and a client at three. I had allotted an hour or so for each. My 12:00 went till 3, and my 3:00 went until 6:15. This resulted in me talking for 6 hours straight. The next day I got seriously sick. I’ve been sick on and off all month. I realized that this is my own invitation to change. I had blown out my Throat Chakra through sheer stubbornness, refusing to accept the soul’s right to not change at all. My compassion and empathy pull me into the person’s internal landscape, blinding me temporarily to the undertones of resistance I was picking up on. If there is a tiny shred of hope, I’m going to keep trying, at my own expense.
I am committed to resolving this pattern now. If I don’t confront this on a deeper level, my Higher Self will have no other option than to up the ante. No, thanks. People are responsible for their own choices, their own actions. Or lack of actions. I love this quote by Jung, “ You are what you do, not what you say you’ll do.” There are always excuses about not changing. In Chinese medicine, the Kidney Qi is about self-empowerment, self-reflection, and willingness. We cannot give those things to anyone, a person has to be willing to do their own work, to engage in their own process. All we can be is supportive, shining a light through the darkness of fear. That’s what blocks change, after all.
I have been given this teaching over and over, as far back as 25 years ago. I get it now. It’s a new day, a new beginning. As soon as I see the message from the soul in front of me, “ No useful moves detected”, I’m done. I will always do the best I can, with love. That’s all I can expect of myself. I will be starting a new blend of herbs to support this healing. It should be interesting. I’ll keep you posted. Blessings, Judith